Miracle at Drew Memorial

16 years ago today, My mother passed. With that sad moment in my life at hand, still God performed a miracle one day earlier that I will keep in my heart forever.
My mother was diagnosed with terminal cancer. For about three days she was a patient at Drew Memorial Hospital. A miracle was all that we could hope for, because we knew her days were numbered. Bed-ridden and full of pleurisy, she finally slipped into a coma on the 20th of September. I called my sister in Phoenix, Arizona and told her that if she wanted to at least see mom while she was still alive, she might want to get on the earliest flight out. My sister's daughter was only 3 months old, and of course, she had never been in the presence of my mother. Nick was only 11 months old, but since he lived in Monticello, my mother spent plenty of days with him, and Kristie was able to spend almost six years of her life getting to know her. And what a wonderful woman to know. She definitely lived the life of a Saint. Those who knew her, were better people by knowing her. Goodness surrounded her everywhere she went. Her newest granddaughter was three months old, and my mother was wanting to meet her so bad. But her ailment for the past three months would not allow her to travel to Phoenix to see her. And now, here she was, in a coma, and all odds were against her ever holding her newest grandchild.

I told my sister that she was in a coma and that she needed to come to town ASAP. My sister's flight was scheduled to arrive in Little Rock in the evening of September 21st. My dad took over the duty of watching my mom while I went to Little Rock to pick up my sister, her daughter, and her husband. It was a long trip for them with a new born. We stopped and ate a late dinner, and then on to Monticello we went. We arrived in Monticello around 10 pm. I asked my sister if she wanted to go to the hospital tonight or wait until the morning. She said to go to the hospital.
We headed out to the hospital, and my dad had already gone home for the night.

When we all walked into her room, my sister just started bawling, and of course, that made me cry also. My sister put her daughter down right beside my mother, and then an incredible miracle happened.
My mother suddenly came out of her coma. She didn't say a word to anyone in the room, she didn't even acknowledge anyone else in the room. She had a huge smile on her face, only looking at her granddaughter. Her granddaughter also had a great big smile on her face, like if they were the only two in the whole state of Arkansas left. My mom pulled her little socks off and played with the baby. The room was just full of love between these two individuals. There was sighs and ohs, and other cheerful moans from the both of them. It seemed like they played together for several hours. Finally, it was time for us to leave. I'm not even sure that the hospital ever knew that my mom came out of her coma that evening. As far as they knew, she was in a coma the whole time.
My mom died early the next morning.... I believe that she was hanging on to life until she got to meet her other granddaughter before passing away.

I miss her so much, it just leaves a big gulp in my throat that I can't seem to swallow when I think about it. She was so smart, probably the smartest person that I ever knew. She had been rated a genius from a child. Valavictorian (probably spelled wrong) of her High School and Saluitorian (this one too) of her University. Even though you can't find her in any history book, to me she was famous. I dedicate this blog tonight to her in her memory. I pray that I can be just half the parent to my children that she was to me.
I Love You MOM. Your Son, Kevin......

I'd Like to Buy the World a Coke, and keep it company.

I'd Like to to buy the World a Home, and furnish it with love.
Grow apple trees and honey bees, and snow white turtle doves.

I'd like to teach the world to sing, in perfect harmony.
I'd like to buy the world a coke, and keep it company.

God is the Real Thing.

When Nick was 4 years old, I had the great pleasure of visiting the Grand Canyon. This place tests each and everyone of your senses all at once. Your eyes can't begin to grasp all of the beauty, it's just breath taking and overwhelming throughout your entire visit. To a 4 year old child, it's scary. I remember vividly that Nick wouldn't even trust me to hold him while we looked over the canyon. He was too scared that something might happen and I might let him go. That the canyon was too powerful for me to hold him into safety. But that didn't matter to me then, or in the years to come, even though he didn't trust me in that one situation, I still loved him the same no matter what.

God is the same way in my life. I am so scared that He is going to let me go. So afraid that I won't let Him pick me up to see the incredible breath taking life He has in store for me. You don't realize things like this until actual miracles happen in your life. The problem is that miracles are happening to me every second of my life, I just don't ever take the time to stop and appreciate this Grand Canyon of my life that God is trying to show me. I actually believe that this concept can be applied to anyone's life.

If I can, I want to share with you, the latest "Praise God" miracles in my life. As most people know, I lost my job exactly 2 months ago. During that time several individuals have stepped up and have really helped us out. I just want to thank each and every one of you who have blessed Tammie and me beyond the call of "just friends". One couple last month gave us $200 to help with bills! Two other couples either treated us out to eat or had us to their home and fed us! Another couple gave us $100 to help with bills! A local church gave us a box of food! A good friend was trying to keep me in "on the side, under the table, little jobs" to help with my financial situation! This was all in the first month of my unemployment! Just this week we received $100 from anonymous in the mail! My dad has furnished gasoline in my vehicle to go to Central Arkansas twice for interviews! And supplied gasoline in my vehicle to take Nick to Pine Bluff to get his braces removed! I can't even begin to describe how my dad has helped me throughout the course of my entire life!
After all of that, I'm still afraid to let God hold me in his arms over His Grand Canyon. I'm still afraid to look over the edge of His steadfast Love. Which leads me to another miracle that happened this past Thursday.
Tammie and I have been looking through the newspapers for job listings. We've decided that no matter where God provides a job for us, we think that we are ready to pack our things up and go there. So, I find myself in Conway on Thursday at an interview for a pretty promising job.
My interview was set at 10:00 am with a Tony Davis. I was 10 to 15 minutes early. So there I was sitting in a small voyeur entrance to the offices of Conway Machine Inc. 25 or 30 minutes passed when suddenly I felt an oh so familiar feeling come upon me... My sugar was dropping, rapidly. I'm thinking to myself, "OH NO!!!!!, what am I going to do?" I usually keep some peanut butter crackers with me in these ever so often emergencies, but they were in the van and I didn't want to walk out and send a wrong vibe to the Tony Davis, if he had come to the entrance to get me. So I just sat there. As the cold clammy sweat was pouring down my cheek, and my head was becoming dizzy, and I was becoming weaker and weaker by the nano-second, I said a little prayer.
"God, just take this from me please, so I can get through this interview."
No sooner than I finished that prayer, I heard a voice coming from behind the door talking to the receptionist at the window. "Please tell Kevin that I will be , a little while, we have run into some problems, and I will get with him just as soon as we get them taken care of."
Before she opened the window, I was thinking, "well....Do I have time to go and get those crackers?" She opened the window and told me what I already had heard, and the suddenly she said, "Can I offer you a coke?" I said, "That would be Great!!!!"
About half-way through the coke, the moment that I regained my senses to normal, that exact moment, the door opened and Tony Davis was ready for me to begin my interview.

Ask, Seek, Knock.....
Matthew 7:7-8
7) "Ask and it will be given you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. 8) For everyone who asks receives; he who seeks finds; and to him who knocks, the door will be opened."

The interview went great, I may or may-not get the job, but the wonderful thing I learned was that God was holding me over His Grand Canyon that day. Allowing me to see the breath-taking beauty of His creation and His love. I shared a coke with God who knows every hair on my head, every detail about my body, who has planned my life beyond my wildest dreams. God is the real thing. God adds life.

All Wisdom Belongs to God !!!

My lesson in the book of Job.
Elihu pretty much pounded the lesson into Job, Eliphaz, Bildad, Zophar, and myself. That all wisdom belongs to God. We will never understand the depths of knowledge, never grasp His power, no matter what. God measured and erected each and every inch of the earth to it's creation. The creator knows the limits of every single thing from a mite that is unseen by the human eye, to the largest mountain in the world or on any other planet in all the universes. We gain knowledge and wisdom by studying His word, but will never gain the knowledge or wisdom to direct lightning bolts through the sky, or create the beauty of the horizon in a canyon or mountain or anywhere. We can only capture a moment of the beauty in vision. Sometimes in a picture or painting we can savor the beauty for years and years. Sometimes even in a beautiful song. Praises still should all go to God, for who created our eyes to see the beauty, or the hands to paint the picture, or the ability to sing and write and play a song. The Creator God, makes, molds, and even at times destroys anything and everything. Who can even come close to the wisdom of God. Until now the definition of wisdom wasn't as powerful to me as it is now. Now it's undefinable. The song "Indescribable" by Chris Tomlin, more or less reflects this. Instead of Indescribable, it should be Undefinable. Only God knows the true definition of Wisdom. Webster can only attempt to define the word "Wisdom" through a human's understanding. The definition in all dictionaries should have a final definition beside it of: "God only knows".
As I finished up the book of Job this morning, my devotion in the New testament had me in the book of "1 Peter". I can in some way relate to Job in his sufferings. Not by far does the limits of my suffering come close to his, but in a couple of ways, I was able to understand through my personal affairs how he felt. Just by reading some of his blog in the bible, I felt that at times he was even contemplating suicide. Though it has not come to that for me, I have asked God to wake me up from this nightmare of my life that I am having at this time. If it ever gets as bad as it was for Job, God forbid, I am almost certain that I would probably die in my self-pity. I didn't know what suffering was until I read the book of Job. Most of it is pretty depressing. Especially for someone going through heavy storms of their own. Chapter 1 of 1 Peter, and the final chapter of Job, reminded me of the hope that God has for me.
1 Peter 1 : 3-9 (from NIV translation)
Praise to God for a Living Hope
3)Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ! In his great mercy he has given us new birth into a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead, 4)and into an inheritance that can never perish, spoil or fade kept in heaven for you, 5)who through faith are shielded by God's power until the coming of the salvation that is ready to be revealed in the last time. 6)In this you greatly rejoice, though now for a little while you may have had to suffer grief in all kinds of trials. 7)These have come so that your faith of greater worth than gold, which perishes even though refined by fire may be proved genuine and may result in praise, glory and honor when Jesus Christ is revealed. 8)Though you have not seen him, you love him; and even though you do not see him now, you believe in him and are filled with an inexpressible and glorious joy, 9)for you are receiving the goal of your faith, the salvation of your souls.
1 Peter goes on to remind me to be Holy, and to set my Hope on the grace to be given me when Jesus Christ is revealed. To be obedient....Pretty much to walk through these storms in complete faith, and praise God for it.
It is so easy for someone not going through heavy trials and tribulations to give advise to those who are. I know, I have been there. In both situations. Which for Now I am on the short end of the straw.
I know of families who have walked away from the church, and worse, away from God, because they thought that they were being treated unfair. I honestly believe that a Professed Christian, who doesn't study God's word, will do this over and over again. They blame everyone but themselves. Including God. Job proves that even in a good studier of the Word, one can fall into the self-pity of their storms. I pray to God that no matter how bad the storm gets, that I can hold on to this understanding of what God promises me. I pray that the eye of the storm has already passed me and my family by and that clear weather is in my forecast. I pray to God that my needs will be met, over and beyond my wildest dreams. I could list them now, but God knows my needs and will take care of them. Forgive me Lord for my impatiencence, help me understand more of the hope you have for me. Help me obedientent to your commands and expectations.
And, even if you do not lift me out of this storm, I will still profess Your name and Praise You in all. I am but just a lightning bolt, ready for you to tell me where to go. AMEN.

My life compared to Job's

This morning's devotion, God lead me to the book of Job. Let me just say, I am not a reader. God knows my heart, and knows my wisdom, and knows that anything more than a chapter at a time to read for me, I lose interest quickly. However, He still placed this at my feet this morning. I have read 22 Chapters of this (so far) depressing book in the Old Testiment.
Old Testiment: Defined by me : Yet more reading that most of the time, I don't understand, and therefore, lose interest quickly.
I have read this book before, and as defined above, it didn't soak in. Go figure..... For the life of me, I can't remember how this book ended. So far, I find myself even more depressed than I was before I started this book. I had to take a break......I am worn out from depression, so much so, that the only way I can feel better is to write about it. I'm not sure that I want to finish this book today, in fear of how it might turn out. It just gets worse and worse.
Job, a blameless man before God, is going through torture beyond the unknown. Even though I have titled this blog "My life compared to Job's", there is no way my life even comes close to his. and I am not blameless. I am a sinner among the best of them. On top of that, I have blamed God for my misfortunes, so what are my chances compared to Job's?
Anyhow, I know there is a great leason in the midst of all of this...........Until later....Chow!!!!

Did Arkansas Fans get blindsided?

50-14. Final Score.....For those of you out there that seem to think that us Arkansas fans are stupid to keep following such a loser of a team, let me chime in with some things.... Some of you guys, especially the ones who aren't from Arkansas are sitting back and laughing at us "Faithful Hog Fans" in pity, and then you don't understand why that doesn't bother us when we get right back on the band wagon of Calling the Hogs. You can't seem to figure out why do we take up for a team that just lost to USC on national TV embarrassingly 50-14. Or even a more embarrassing loss last year 70-17. Why you ask?????? Because I am not from USC. or Texas or Florida, or anywhere else. I was born and raised in Arkansas. The USA basketball this past weekend just lost to Greece and had to settle for the Bronze medal. This is a team that should be whipping everyone they play by 30 points or more, yet they didn't. Do I denounce my membership from the United States just because they can't win something? WOW!!!!! Where would we be today if we did that on every defeat?
The fact is, I am proud to be an American. I am proud to be an Arkansan. I am proud to be a Monticelloian. I will continue to back, America, Arkansas, Monticello High School and UAM. I back even Arkansas State even though I have only been to that city once in my lifetime. Just because they are a division 1 school representing the state of Arkansas.
Yes I agree that us "Hog Fans" get a little unrealistic at times. However, in our defense, there were several national media sports reporters that were claiming that the Razorbacks were going to upset USC on Saturday, including Lou Holtz himself. It's always safe to predict an upset. Because sometimes they happen. USC had more to lose from a defeat than Arkansas did. Did our loss prove you pessimist wrong? Absolutely not!!! USC was preseasoned ranked #3. Coming off an undefeated season only losing to Texas in the Rose Bowl. In fact, they haven't had a regular season loss in almost four years. They were suppose to win.
Ronny Williams will be going into work tomorrow to tell all of his employees "I told you so", and laughing at their ignorance on why they love the Hogs so much, just to find out, that no matter what he says, they will still love the Hogs. Sorry Ronny, you are out numbered. You would get the same result if you were the General Manager in any other state. For instance, A Cowboy fan will follow the Cowboys through 1-15 seasons.
What is our reward for our faithfulness to our beloved team? Really nothing.... It could go on for years and years of non-winning seasons. My reward is the fellowship of other football fans. Tailgating, parties, get togethers......Grilling, Barbecues.......Cheerleaders, whoops....sorry Tammie.......The crisp cool air on my face. It's football season, and I love it !!!!!!! Even you Arkansas fair weather fans ( who should be ashamed of yourselves) (Jeff) , love the whole concept of "FOOTBALL SEASON". The reason I say that you fair weather fans should be ashamed of yourselves is because, you claim you are done with Arkansas Football, but when Arkansas has a good season, you jump right back on the band-wagon. I need to get off of the "Fair Weather Fans" now, because I could get really nasty.
As far as Houston Nutt is concerned.....well....maybe he should go... I don't know.... I do know this though...... With leadership comes a hard job..... Ask anyone in a leadership position. Moms and Dads, Principiles, Pastors........ or.......George Bush..... A great example. There are some of us that would love to see George Bush resign. However, he is our leader....... Wheather we like him or not, we still live in the greatest country in the world. Bush is loved by some and hated by others......Ditto for Bill Clinton......... Yet they were leaders for the same goal......... Our beloved Country............... I guess what I am trying to say is that no matter who is in the leadership position, no matter what he does, he will not do everything right.. He will..... Step on some toes...... Insult some people...... Be unliked and liked all in the same.... Nolen Richardson gave Arkansas a National Championship, yet we couldn't wait to get rid of him..... Need I say more????? Moving on.....
Monticello goes to play Warren this Friday night. What are their chances of winning ? Slim and none. Does that make me a Lumberjack fan? Heck no!!!!!! I wish that Monticello would clobber them........ But the reality is that Warren is too good. However, there is always a chance... That's why they play the game. If games were decided by who should win, then they would never play. Should I pull for Warren knowing in advance that we shouldn't win? Of course not !!!! Go Billies, Beat Warren.....
If your children played on a little league football, baseball or any sports team, and they never won a game, you would not turn your back on them. Everyone wants to be on a winning team. I say you're a winner if you have something to believe in. You can't take that feeling away from the ones who love their team, and get pumped year after year about the upcoming season.
Again.... I am pumped about the upcoming Football Season...... I love it and will never give up on the Razorbacks...... I get excited about college and pro football. Florida State plays Miami, Florida tonight, and even though I don't care who wins, It will be like watching a great movie in my book.
To those fair weather fans.......Shame on You....
To those Razorback fans........Whooooo Pig Suie!!!!!!!!!!
To those Football fans.........."ARE YOU READY FOR SOME FOOTBALL!?!?!?!?!?!?!?"